Haircuts, nails, gym subscriptions, new wardrobes, evenings out… these are all expensive things we have learned we need to feel good. But you may have noticed, that despite the expense, the dopamine hit doesn’t last. Dopamine doesn’t last- it is a short hit and then you come down. You may feel a little surge each time you receive a compliment for your new haircut or shoes. But even this can leave you feeling empty when you are sat by yourself.
Much of what we have learned is good living is based on a system that wants us to spend money, have shallow unfocused attention. The gnawing sense of meaningless in the dark moments of the night creates a void we need to fill with more spending of money and short-term fixes. It is why so much internet shopping happens in the middle of the night.
Much of what we have learned decides whether we are worthy is dependent on the approval and judgement of other people, systems and a voice inside that perhaps doesn’t really feel like me.
The therapy I offer is £75 a session. It is less than a haircut and much less than a new wardrobe. But unlike the haircut that grows out, your therapy grows with you. It gives you resources to face the judgements and the disapproval of others with curiosity and to address the void head on, without fear. It is not a wand to make everything wonderful, but what once seemed impossible or terrifying, may no longer seem so huge.
If you came to therapy to quit smoking, you may or may not achieve that outcome, but the exploration you will take and the small shifts you will make will lead to positive changes in your day-to-day functioning. Everyone who turns to therapy openly will find lasting value in it.